*estimated read time: 4 minutes*
Hi Reader,
Let me preface this by saying that while I believe we all have the capacity and ability to heal many of our wounds past and present, including around money, we also live within a capitalist, ableist patriarchal system which we are all deeply and perpetually traumatized from…….so “healing” doesn’t just fall on the shoulders of individuals. It’s not just an individual responsibility - It’s also systemic and collective.
Anyways, if you read my last newsletter you know that after using some specific EFT prompts that I gave a friend, she ended up cutting ties with a client who was trying to gaslight, manipulate and generally disrespect her.
One of the things that she had to work through with her Tapping was her money scarcity and her fear that if she said no to them, that she was cutting off her only source of revenue (valid!).
Having grown up most of her childhood with very little money and working from a very young age - on top of the current market we're in - you can see why this would be extremely activating and terrifying for her.
She, and honestly most of us, have limiting beliefs around money not only from the trauma of capitalism but from our own lived and generational experiences (let me know which ones resonate for you):
- I’ll never have enough
- There is never enough money
- I can’t trust money
- I am not good with money
- I have to work HARD to make money
- I don’t know how to make money
- Money makes people bad
- Money is scary
- Money is bad
- Money is evil
……..the list goes on.
However, by going through the EFT Tapping points and regulating her nervous system while allowing herself to feel her fear and anxiety about cutting this cord, she was able to slow her breathing, lower her heart rate and ease the pit in her stomach.
She turned off her stress response.
Then, by going through the EFT Tapping points while gently recalling an earlier memory from childhood where she experienced similar feelings of money scarcity, she was able to calm her nervous system and let her body know that right here in this moment, they were safe.
She was not re-living her past.
And finally, by going through the EFT Tapping points while focusing on how she wanted to feel about money and what she wanted to do now, she was able to re-wire a new feeling and belief: “It’s safe for me to trust money.”
From this regulated place, and out of her scarcity trauma response, she was able to see more clearly and see options that weren’t there before.
The next day, not only did the sh**ty client agree to compensate her for previous work done, but an opportunity also came through where they offered double her day rate (the highest rate she’s ever received in her freelance career) because they respected her work so much.
Now, to be responsible, while I do believe that everything is energy and I am certain that in clearing this money scarcity block she was able to shift her energy (and reality), there are other factors contributing to her success - she’s an able bodied cis woman, she’s been doing what she’s doing for a very long time, she’s well connected and has a large network to tap into and people often refer her.
The point here is that by using EFT Tapping, she was able to create a different belief for herself, make a different choice and that then led to a domino effect of different outcomes.
Had she stayed with the original client, who did not respect her, she not only would have stayed in an unhealthy and abusive working dynamic, she would have made less money, missed out on healthier and more fulfilling opportunities and continued to reinforce her personal beliefs around scarcity and her own worth.
So yes, while we all do live within (and suffer from) the deeply unjust and traumatizing structures of capitalism / white supremacy / patriarchy, there are still some things we can do on our side of the street to shift our relationship to money, the beliefs we store around it and the choices we make with it.
Unfortunately, despite what a lot of these wellness trends may say, shifting beliefs around money doesn’t often just happen from repeating affirmations multiple times a day about how much money you want to make…….especially if you don’t actually emotionally or energetically believe your affirmations.
It’s like gaslighting yourself.
Instead we can use EFT to:
- Reveal the truth of how we actually feel
- Feel (*gasp*) what we feel (safely)
- Heal the feeling and the nervous system
- Then we can dream / vision / manifest / collaborate / show up with far more ease and clarity
For me? I know there is no way in hell I could have left my corporate job and continued to be an entrepreneur and artist for the last 6 years without healing my nervous system (and A LOT of community support), addressing - and continuing to address - my own money fears and creating a new, healthier relationship to it.
What are some of your personal beliefs around money? Where do you see it showing up in your life? How are you learning or unlearning to shift them?
Reply back and let me know.
Sending you care,
Bianca
p.s - If you are a freelancer and and don't want to be at the mercy of crazy clients, my friend Brionna - The Everyday Lawyer - is running a workshop How to Write Fair and Inclusive Contracts on October 17th.